Chapter 120: Bulgogi for breakfast
Photo- Antelope Canyon, AZ Oct 2023. Bulgogi is delicious, but not photogenic
Hello from South Korea! I’m sitting in the airport lounge during my lengthy layover as I make my way from home in Minnesota to Nepal.
For those new to this blog, welcome! I’m Courtney, a four-year survivor of an incurable brain cancer called anaplastic astrocytoma. I started this blog from a hospital bed in Thailand back in January 2020, when my life changed forever.
Blog posts these days come few and far between for great reasons- treatment stabilized my cancer and motivated me to absolutely squeeze every last drop out of life’s sweet fruit. These days, I write a blog here and there between my days as a hospital medicine physician, speaker and advocate for patient advocacy and brain cancer awareness. I also dabble in academic medical education, writing (2nd edition of Difficult Gifts coming to you soon. Sequel still in progress…at a slower less “holy crap I’m dying” pace this time around), yoga, and traveling (CC point game is the new couponing and I’m all for it).
As I sit in the ICN airport, an airport I’m lucky enough to have visited multiple times over these past four years, I’m eating pancakes with a side of bulgogi pork and reading a cancer magazine “Elephants and Tea.” This magazine refers to cancer as “the elephant in the room,” whereas my blog “Elephants, Lotus, Brain Tumor” refers to elephants as a metaphor for our wisdom- our ability to learn, remember, forgive, and mourn.
Matter of fact, that is what book #2 is about! No more details for now.
Ok, I’m all distracted here. I could blame it on the 13+ hour time difference, jet lag, or lack of caffeine, but really that is just me. My brain, pre and post tumor, seems to want to fire every neuron all at once.
I was inspired to write today for three reasons, so I’ll get to it.
1) Cancer and Friendship
2) Traveling with Cancer
3) Action items- raising awareness
First, this “Elephants and Tea” magazine is all about friendships and cancer- how some blossom whereas others disintegrate. I’ve written about this before, but it’s particularly fascinating to me how even just a few years out from diagnosis, friendship through cancer is an ever-changing journey, and how similar my experience is to other young adults with cancer.
Shortly after my diagnosis, I remember feeling both powerful, overwhelming support and profound, gut-wrenching loss. Some of my strongest relationships ended rather abruptly. I was shocked by this “cancer ghosting” but now see that I am not alone in this. To some people, the reality of maintaining a relationship with a person needing extra emotional or physical support is simply too much. For others, I think the realization that maintaining a friendship that may lead to heartache is a bit more than some can handle.
On the reverse side, I found many relationships that flourished. Acquaintances turned into lifelong friends, distant relatives and colleagues because trusted confidantes. Fellow cancer warriors turned into friends, therapist, and yoga buddies.
Doing my first power-flow yoga class with a cancer bestie made us both feel a not-so-subtle “If anyone knew we both had cancer, they would understand how badass we are” feeling I still think about when I need a boost.
Plus, I met my husband! Never saw that one coming.
So – cancer and friendships. If you have a new diagnosis, please know you are not alone. You are strong. Not everyone is strong enough to get through this with you. You will find those relationships that grow and they will be better than anything you’ve known before.
Secondly, travel! Hey again from ICN- made it through my bulgogi and onto some ramen.
I’ll never again ride a bike without a helmet, but I will take every possible risk to see this beautiful world. Traveling with cancer can be scary. What if I run out of medications? What if I have a seizure? What if my body can’t handle the altitude change? These thoughts matter, but planning ahead, getting quality travel insurance, talking to your medical team, and looking up disability accommodations abroad can make a big difference.
Instead, I try to focus more on these questions- What if I see the most beautiful temple? What if I try bulgogi for breakfast? What if I find time for introspection? What if I learn I am stronger, braver, and more capable than I knew?
I dare you to find out.
Third and last (for those still reading these random thoughts)- some action items. Can you help me raise awareness for two activities near and dear to my heart?
MN Brain Tumor 5K: Save the Date! May 19, 2024 we’re back in action for a 4th year of Courtneys’ Crew. Join our team in-person or virtually and watch 100% of your donations go directly to brain tumor research.
https://www.wizathon.com/walktoendbraintumors-mn/?p=display&action=team_Page&id=8605
Humor to Fight the Tumor: I’m blessed to join the board of directors for this awesome organization. Save the Date! September 7, 2024 for a gala honoring those with brain tumors. Join or donate to this event to help some really impactful research and support programs in MN.
MN readers- Are you or a loved one currently living with (or thriving or surviving or suffering with) a brain tumor? Nominate them (or yourself!) to be honored at this event. I don’t want a brain tumor either, but if I have to have one, I might as well get a fancy party out of it.
https://www.humortofightthetumor.org/
Fondly,
Courtney
©️ CB2024