Chapter 83: You Are The Difference

On my drive home from work today, the city bus in front of me had an advertisement on it. I have no idea what it was for, but in bold letters it said, “You are the Difference.”

I thought about this on my entire drive home and kept thinking about it on a long walk after work with my dogs.

I thought about this statement so much, in fact, that it inspired me to write a blog post, something I haven’t done in far too long. (Sorry for that)

“You are the difference.” As I reflected on this statement, my mind replayed my entire day in slow motion. As my mind repeated the events of the day, it stopped every time I remembered someone who “was the difference” today. 

When I first read “you are the difference” on that bus, I simply thought it was nice. My mind turned to the obvious people in my life who have been the difference: my family, my friends, my teachers, my mentors, and so on.

Quite interestingly, however, as I reflected more on this bold assertion, I found myself noticing the not so obvious people who were the difference in my day today.

I thought of the nurse in dark blue scrubs who held the door open for me as I walked from my car into the hospital early this morning. She was the difference in helping me walk into work smiling instead of walking in tired and cranky.  

I thought of my co-chief resident who came into our office today to help me out even though she didn’t have to. She knew my day was busy, and she was the difference between me feeling stressed and me feeling efficient.

I thought of the reader who emailed me after finishing Difficult Gifts to thank me for writing it, even though no thank you was necessary. She was the difference in making me feel like my words held power instead of simply taking up space.  

I thought of the man who delivered the lunch I ordered for our resident and student doctors. The delivery driver was late, but he apologized profusely and gave me a gift card for my next order. He was the difference between me feeling upset and me feeling thankful.

I thought of my resident team, who worked tirelessly to help our patients. They were the difference in making not only me feel like we helped people today, but also making so many of our patients feel listened to and healed.

 I thought of my neighbor, who waved to me as I got home from work. She was the difference in me feeling welcomed instead of just feeling present.  

I thought of my mailman, who delivered a package safely to my home while I was working today. I thought of my colleague and friend who put that package together, with a beautiful contemplative Buddha inside which she found at her favorite shop miles away. They made the difference in my mood when I finally stepped inside my home after a long day at work.

I thought of the readers of this blog. You are the difference in making me feel that my thoughts matter.

In my opinion, being the difference in someone’s day does not need to be a grand gesture. These simple things- the smiles, the teamwork, the waves, the apologies and the thank yous, these are the ways we can be the difference in someone’s day, every single day.

Today, I realized that so many people are the difference in my day. I say “are the difference” instead of “make a difference” for a reason. First, this is what the bumper sticker said! But, more importantly, it’s true. You ARE the difference. It is active. It is present. When we are the difference, we don’t just change something, we become something. We take a small act of kindness, of compassion, and we transform.  

We are never empty. We are the difference. For someone, likely someone you don’t even feel you did much for today, you were the difference. For that, I hope you feel happy. I hope you feel purpose. As small as a wave, as tiny as a smile, these actions made the difference in my day today and I am incredibly thankful.

Fondly,

Courtney

©CB2021